My Sister was Born in the Car

If you know anything about me, you know that the first birth I was present for was the birth of my sister.  You may or may not know how that happened.  It's your lucky day, because I'm going to tell you.

Celebrating Change

Welcome to the December 2013 Carnival of Natural Parenting: The More Things Change . . .
This post was written for inclusion in the monthly Carnival of Natural Parenting hosted by Code Name: Mama and Hobo Mama. This month our participants have shared stories and wisdom about life changes.
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Xavi before his haircut

Change feeds my soul.  The concept that despite how great (or not great) life is in this present moment, things can always get better.  I welcome that change.  I welcome the subtleties of this change.  I love the contrast between the transition and the end result.  The transition never looks hopeful in that instant.  Then all of a sudden, the desired outcome appears seemingly out of nowhere!  This is my favorite beauty.

It ain't easy but it ain't hard weight loss program: episode 2

The second installment of the series, "It ain't easy but it ain't hard weight loss program."  The first installment can be found here.


So let's rewind.

I mentioned that I was feeling exhausted and spent from my second pregnancy in two years, and that I had already suspected the nutritional information distributed by the government was kinda weird or something.  It didn't line up.  But I suspected this long before I ever got pregnant.  How did I get off track?  What caused me to completely throw in the towel and listen to the FDA and USDA?  Well, in short, a nutritionist and an ever-ballooning body.

My body had already become stretched far enough past my liking with my first pregnancy, and I never touched back down to my pre-pregnancy weight before I was--yes--pregnant again.  By month 6.5 into pregnancy number two, I was larger than I had wanted to be.  Not overtly down on myself, but small inklings of doubt in my body and its ability to take care of itself.  So I won a free month of nutritional advice from an RD and thought this would be the chance I needed to learn what my body needed.  They even included weekly meetings to help with accountability.  She said she would help me not gain too much weight.  Well, they say you get what you pay for...

The nutritionist gave me a website and told me to enter in everything I eat.  I was obsessed with this website.  I would nitpick every single thing I ate, entering it into the website, making little recipes on the website, googleing the fast food places I went to and finding their nutritional information (best thing I learned from this is the tortilla at Chipotle is 280 calories, taking off of which makes a 900-cal meal into 600.  I didn't like that tortilla anyway...).  It was exhausting and took about 3 hours per day.  I found myself changing my diet based more on what was easiest to put into the computer than what my body needed.

The nutritionist came back and said to me, "you are eating too much fat."  She gave me the plan of 50% carbohydrate, 25% protein, 25% fat.  I was eating 30% and that was me eating everything "fat-free."  Wasn't avocado and nut fat okay? Then I had this weird idea that more protein equals more healthy so I would add protein powder to everything.  I had a goal of 150-180 grams of protein per day.  Whole grains were a must-have.  Whole grains and protein.  Some fruit and vegetables.  Then ice cream--or frozen yogurt for healthy twist.

 I became depressed.  I was obsessed with an obligation to a website.  My body was changing constantly and I felt like I had to control every calorie or else face permanent weight gain.  Two pounds per pregnancy. That's what the media had touted.  After six weeks on this plan and tracking my food, I went to my midwife. My weight had leveled off.  I had not gained a pound.  Wait a minute, I thought.  Aren't I supposed to gain weight?  Maybe this isn't useful for right now.  Maybe this is not healthy to my baby.  I stopped tracking my food and just started eating whatever.  It was still sugar and protein powders.  Some vegetables and whole grains.  Her advice was still ringing in my ears...

It All Began...

Hi.  I'm Jaye Anne.

When I was eight years old, my sister was born.  It was a rather warm morning at 6am, and my mom had awoken with what she thought were gas pains and a few minutes later realized it was in fact labor.  A few minutes was important because this baby was coming.  FAST.  My dad got us all up (I thought he was joking but decided to get dressed just to humor him), and hurried us out to the car.  It didn't matter much though.  We hit traffic (did I mention I live in Northern Virginia?) and about 2 miles down the road we had to pull over because my sister was going to be born headfirst into some pants.  With one gutteral groan the baby fell out onto the seat.  Then there was much commotion and concern and finally my mom lifted up a screaming Michela and announced, "it's a girl!"

One, I was excited.  After two brothers (booring!), I was so happy that it was a girl.  Two, I am pretty sure I thought that was my baby.  Being present for that birth changed my life and set me on a course to love birth, babies, and definitely pregnancy.

I am so happy that my sister was born in the car.  If I had not witnessed that birth, maybe I would have believed all the hype on TV and in movies.  To me, normal birth did not require doctors or even any type of bed.  Birth did not have to make a lot of noise or harbor a lot of fear.  It could be peaceful and even occur in a moving car.  I must have gone through this serene scenario a thousand times in my mind while I was pregnant with both my kids.

I know now that my parents were probably more stressed out about it than they let on at the time, but I definitely didn't notice.  All I saw was this wonderful miracle unfolding while I sat in the back seat.  Pregnancy and birth indelibly became intertwined with my life.