Conscious Selfishness

I have been letting the last few weeks slip away.  This is mostly because I am very inward-focused now.  Focused on my health, focused on my consciousness, and focused on looking for a job.  My birthday came in the middle of all of that, which is my favorite day of the year.  Again, it was an inward, self-focus.  I have been kind of "getting through" breastfeeding lately.  From the outside, this might look selfish or lazy.  I really feel that if we work on ourselves as a being, we will become better mothers and our children will be better for it.  The important thing is to know whether the selfishness is an addiction, an escape, or just an energy booster.  There is a balance in everything.  I know this is a short period of time, so I am enjoying being me and maybe being a little selfish.